天美麻豆

I聽 must聽 say when I read the orignal thread I wondered who the author conversed with, where did he get the ideas on Liybian women and stress. I totally agree with you that women here work hard and often at the hurdle of marriage are often told to give up their studies or job. Not all of course, but the stress is getting married and trying to study further or keep their job.I have great respect for the women I work with and meet in my work. They are strong and care more about getting things done than some men that work 9 am - 2pm and sit in coffee houses or whatever they do.

Libyan women are very hard working and deal with stress like women everywhere.聽 Libyan men are sooooo spoiled! I tell you, you would have a hard time finding a Western woman who would put up with what Libyan women have to deal with.聽 Most Libyan men could run screaming if they saw into the lives of some western households.聽 Men cooking and cleaning to help out, or being Mr.Mom. :)Women here do everything in the home, so of course working outside of the home does not have much appeal,that is if they are allowed to do so. The meals these women can whip up are amazing. Tonnes of different dishes that are all time consuming to prepare.聽 I admire their strength and patience.

Of course I cannot speak for all Libyan women or generalize -- I am talking about what I have seen personally). The women I have met do not ever have to work or worry about supporting themselves or their kids (first their fathers and/or brothers support them then their husbands and/or adult sons). Sure women do things around the house and take care of the kids but that seems reasonable since their husbands work and provide for the family so this would be splitting responsibilities.

The only other thing women seem to do is visit other women and hang out at weddings and funerals.

As far as meals...(again, this is just my personal experience)... to be honest I have not been to too many houses for meals BUT anywhere I go it's the same basic recipes over and over. I do not think the Libyan women I have met know more than 10 recipes.聽 Rice + tomato sauce.聽 Pasta + tomato sauce.聽 Couscous + tomato sauce....聽 (I cannot exactly blame them because there are not many different ingredients available in the stores).

Of course if we go higher up the hierarchy of needs, for an ambitious woman who has to struggle to achieve her potential in this male-dominated society life is stressful.

However, speaking of the basics, I see the lives of Libyan women as quite boring but simple and not nearly as stressful as the lives of Western women.

Just do an inventory of everything you HAVE to do in your home country and what stresses you out and compare apples to apples to the life of Libyan women.

Taking the film "Mona Lisa Smile" for example - I guess its all goes down to what we want in life whether we want to be career woman earning our own money being independent and free or bringing up the perfect family by being the perfect housewife.

Definition of stress thus may vary according to "discipline".

My first few months here I did wonder what the women do in their time as I observed every house, shutters are never opened, and some houses in the middle of dusty nowhere are of course in the middle of nowhere. And also noticed Hammams(sauna) for women are usually opened during the day and caters to men after 4.30pm hence giving me a hint on their daily activities.

I also envied the receptionist who had the time to paint her nails and do her make up every hour, or the women who left the office on time without the anxiety of deadlines or what's going to happen when we run out of bitumen. Or how they can afford expensive perfume/shoes/etc with the small salary they earn - must be the parents or the rich fiance. So I figured women here work to pass the time.

But it was the same in Missouri small town Springfield. Everyone was laid back you could see it by the obesity rate. They were stressed alright from the boyfriends that got them pregnant, that you make a point when someone asks u out for a date, u ask them if they had kids, beforehand. Quite a number (more than ordinary) girls I met were single mums with a kid never been married, and kid's dad lives a few blocks away. But of course, I can't judge little Springfield by the crowd I hung out with.

So u change the type of crowd you were in and meet other new people then you realize we are no different from eachother although we come from the other side of the world.

And from all this babble i have written, the conclusion is, we never met enough people in life to stereotype them, which only makes us confused even more.


Smallworld, I do agree with the recipes.. we have a cook at the office with the same red tomato sauce and the same dough+fillings for the 100 designs they make. They are not adventurous with food.
Wonder why there's no 'Libyan Cuisine Restaurant' anywhere else in the world ?

Rocko, you propose that what we know about a people is inevitably limited by our interaction(s) with them. I disagree.

There are numerous ways to make surprisingly accurate deductions about a society and its individuals based on more than the few and limited interactions we have with them.
The uniform and utter lack of variety and quality in everyday consumer products tells us that Libyans are complacent and uneducated consumers, and considering Libya's Power Distance ranking, it's easy to understand how, why and how deep blatant ignorance and complacency have permeated the culture.
And I can go on and on about what else we can learn just by observing Libyans' shopping behavior and analysing the local consumer-supplier relationship.

And that's where women play a greater role. Observing them, however, isn't so easy in a place like Tripoli. In his attempt to attain a better understanding, one can barely escape the predominance of the male perspective.

So I hope that more female members (Libyans or otherwise) pitch in.